Monday, October 18, 2010

Love All, Trust A Few, Do Wrong To None.



Some misconceptions about black folks






1. BLACK PEOPLE AREN'T PATRIOTIC- That is so wrong. Black folks are some of the most patriotic A-merry-cans. Trust me, I know, I have been in quite a few knock down drag out fights with my A-merry-can brothers and sisters about my patriotism, because I happen to have been born outside of the country. Black folks love this country. If they didn't, they would have burned it down a long time ago.




2. BLACK PEOPLE ALWAYS AGREE WITH EACH OTHER- Nothing could be farther from the truth. Black folks love to argue and fight more than any other group. We don't ever agree on shit. Don't believe me? Put a bunch of black folks in a room and watch them try to come together around a common goal. Talk about "herding cats."




3. BLACK FOLKS ARE SOFT ON CRIME- This is for my colleague. I hope he is reading the blog tonight as well. Any trial lawyer who practices cases in urban areas knows this: Black folks tend to be actually tougher on criminals, because we are more often than not the victims of crimes committed by some of the people in our own neighborhoods. Sadly, the white man's grass is always greener mind set doesn't extend to the criminals among us. To them, our grass is the only one worth taking. So we have no love for that element among our people.




4. BLACK PEOPLE ARE VERY RELIGIOUS- Wrong! Black people love to go to church, but we are not very religious. We will go to church and talk shit about who is wearing what, and about what the pastor talked about in his sermon. But I honestly think that it's a small number of folks in the church who are really religious, or at least trying to be.




5. BLACK FOLKS ALL LOOK ALIKE- Come on now. Look at Flava Flav, and look at Denzel Washington and tell me if you still think that shit is true.




6. BLACK PEOPLE LOVE THEIR CARS MORE THAN THEIR HOUSES. Nope, that's a myth too. We black people just use our cars a a *crutch(thanks PFABA) because we can't get a nice house to live in. I bet if we had nice houses like white folks we would love our houses too. But our credit is fucked up and we can't come up with the $20,000 down payment for a house, so we invest what little money we do have into our cars.




7. BLACK PEOPLE ARE LAZY-Wrong wrong wrong. Black people have no incentive to work because we don't own shit. We figure we are working to make someone else rich, and we are always going to get paid just enough to keep the company profitable. It's why so many black folks work for the post office. We figure if we are going to work, it might as well be for a someone we pay taxes to. At least we can say we own some of the federal government, and we know that if it's not profitable they won't fire our asses.




8. BLACK PEOPLE ALWAYS VOTE FOR THE BLACK CANDIDATE NO MATTER WHAT-Myth! Black people will vote for the black candidate if he is a democratic candidate. Just ask Michael Steele, and Alan Keys if they think black people always vote for the black candidate. A white democrat will beat a black republican in a black neighborhood every time. It's not about race, it's about party.




9. BLACK PEOPLE ARE NOT ADVENTUROUS-Myth! When you are black every day is a fucking adventure. So we don't have to go searching for shit like bungee jumping, and sky diving to get an adrenalin rush. Just walking home from the bus stop is adventure enough for most black folks.




10. BLACK PEOPLE DON'T TIP-This is one of those self fulfilling prophecy deals. If you, the waiter, dumb down your service when you see black folks because you think they won't tip you, guess what's going to happen? You guessed it; bad service, low tip.

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