Man Who Pull Out Too Fast, Leave Rubber ...

Dear Abby:
 I just met the most terrific girl and we get along fabulously.  I
think she's the one for me. There's just one problem: I can't remember
from our first date if she told me she had TB or VD.  What should I do?

Confused

Dear Confused:
 If she coughs, fuck her.

Hi, My Name Is 'A' ... Non Habes Iure Provocare Mihi

You Don't Have The Right To Provoke Me ...

“I PRAISE YOU 24/7!!!!!! AND THIS HOW YOU DO ME!!!!! YOU EXPECT ME TO LEARN FROM THIS??? HOW???!!! ILL NEVER FORGET THIS!! EVER!!! THX THO…”

After dropping five passes in Sunday’s 19-16 loss to the Steelers, Bills wide receiver Steve Johnson blamed an odd culprit for his struggles. Johnson tweeted after the game:

“I PRAISE YOU 24/7!!!!!! AND THIS HOW YOU DO ME!!!!! YOU EXPECT ME TO LEARN FROM THIS??? HOW???!!! ILL NEVER FORGET THIS!! EVER!!! THX THO…”

Johnson did manage to record seven catches but dropped a 40-yard pass in the end zone in overtime that would have given the Bills their third consecutive win.

The third-year receiver leads the Bills with 59 receptions, 796 receiving yards and nine touchdowns. Last week, Johnson had a career-high three touchdowns against the Bengals and celebrated by showing off his undershirt that quoted The Joker, reading “Why so serious?”