Never Invest Your Money In Anything That Eats Or Needs Painting.

Never Invest Your Money In Anything That Eats Or Needs Painting.

The California Chamber of Commerce has produced a white paper cataloging the top 10 mistakes most likely to get a company sued. While a few of the laws cited apply specifically to California, some of them are federal and may apply in your state.

The report observes: "Employers may unintentionally violate employment laws simply by trying to provide some flexibility for an employee, save money for the company or just be nice."

Here are the top 10 mistakes

1. Classifying all employees as exempt, whether they are or not

It may be easier to pay someone a salary rather than figure out overtime, meal breaks, rest breaks and the like. The time (and money) you save on bookkeeping is a false economy, however, since you could pay big time in penalties or a lawsuit. (See the report for more specifics.)

2. Letting employees work through lunch so they can take off early

A non-exempt employee is required to be given a 30-minute meal break, plus a 10-minute break for every four hours worked. If you deny one or the other, you owe the person an extra hour's wages; if you deny both in the same day, you owe an additional two hours. The wages must be paid during the pay period in which it's missed. The employee cannot waive his or her right to the breaks. This isn't just a California issue; here is a recent example in which an employee at a family-owned bakery in Washington allegedly was denied 10-minute breaks.

3. Making everyone an “independent contractor” because having employees is too much trouble

The report notes that contractors are happy until one of the following comes up: workers’ compensation, unemployment insurance, state disability insurance or paid family leave benefits. Avoid these legal spiderwebs by determining who is and who isn't a contractor.

4. Not providing training about harassment and discrimination to managers and supervisors

Don't assume your employees won't need the information. Avoid lawsuits by providing the basic sexual harassment training required by law.

5. Letting employees decide which, and how many, hours they want to work each day

Most employees are restricted by law regarding the number of hours they can work without needing to be paid overtime. If you are allowing longer workdays for four-day workweeks, there are rules that need to be followed. Check with your state laws for specifics.

6. Terminating any employee who takes a leave of absence

From the report: "Employees have legal protection when they are away from work for various reasons, including workers’ compensation, disability, pregnancy, family and medical leave, military leave, jury duty and many more."

7. Withholding an employee's final check if they fail to return company property

You may think you can withhold money while you wait for an employee to return a computer or a cellphone, but think again. Some states have laws that require you hand over the check the minute the words "you're fired" come out of your mouth. And if an employee quits and gives more than 72 hours notice, the check must be ready on his or her last day. The penalties start accruing from the moment the check is late–one day of wages for every calendar day of delay.

8. Providing loans to employees and deducting the money from their paycheck each pay period

This seems perfectly fine, doesn't it? Except most state labor codes permit only paycheck deductions authorized by law and those authorized by the employee for health insurance or other benefits. No other deductions are permitted. If you're making a loan, you should have the employee sign a promissory note and a lawyer review it.

9. Using noncompete agreements to protect confidential information

Many employers force employees to sign these agreements to protect business secrets, customer lists and pricing information and to prevent employees from working for the competition. Essentially, you can't force your employee to stay with you, nor can you prevent him or her from making a living.

10. Implementing a “use it or lose it” vacation policy and avoid paying out all the money at termination

Accrued vacation is a form of wages and cannot be denied. You can stop an employee from accruing vacation beyond a "reasonable" amount, but you cannot take away what he or she has already earned. What is considered a "reasonable" cap? Generally 1.5 to two times the annual accrual, says the report.

Qui Pro Innocente Dicit, Satis Est Eloquens.

He/She Who Speaks For The Innocent Is Eloquent Enough.

Democalypse 2012 - Cockblock the Vote

A Pennsylvania court upholds a controversial voter I.D. law that affects 9% of the entire state electorate, but that's the price you pay to prevent something that doesn't happen or make sense.

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Daily Show: Democalypse 2012 - Cockblock the Vote
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For those of you who continue to doubt whether the voter ID laws being passed around the country are a political tactic by Republicans to steal the vote in the 2012 election.

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Whether you’re first or last, you will be in the seat that is assigned to you. So why is it that everyone has to get up and start huddling towards the gate entrance like its the day after Thanksgiving? This is specifically towards the “senior citizens”. They are usually cane-walking their way to form a line at the gate 15 minutes before the airline even announces they are ready to board. And if I make even the slightest movement in their direction I get a death stare through tinted glasses telling me to back off or die. All I can think about is how easy it would be to give one swift kick to the knee and the old man would collapse. I would never actually do this, but I’m just pointing out the fact that the possibility is there.

So now I’m waiting to board behind a giant huddle of old people and I begin to do a scan of the passengers I will be riding with. I first look for potential disaster passengers such as crying babies or sick people. Then it goes to uncomfortable passengers such as someone with obvious bad hygiene. And lastly is the most important scan: are there any hot chicks? Not that it actually matters because the chances of her sitting by me are slim, but there’s nothing else to do while waiting so I might as well make it interesting.

First the lady with the crying baby walks by. Thankfully she isn’t sitting by me but if she was, I don’t think it would be a problem for long. I don’t know this from experience, but I heard if you shake a baby long enough it stops crying. Don’t know if its true but it seems logical. Next the sick patient walks by. Once again I am grateful this passenger moves along. In these situations your best bet is to mention something about how you worship Satan or let something about a herpes outbreak slip under your breath. They’re essentially guaranteed to not interact with you the entire flight. And then the hot chick starts approaching. Its almost like she is holding up a sign that I can’t quite read until she gets to my row and the words “DENIED” are written on it. I mean come on, is it that much to ask to sit next to someone appealing for once? Maybe its a hot chick. Maybe she has a low cut shirt on. Maybe she laughs at my jokes. I don’t ask for much. But no, the hot chick moves on and who should sit down next to me but a “senior citizen”. I should have gone for the knee, after all...

At this point you are probably wondering why I don’t just read a book or listen to my iPod on the plane. Believe me, I do listen to my iPod, or read a book, or even watch a movie. I’m just saying if I’m going to be stuck in the same seat for 3 hours sitting next to someone else who is stuck in their seat for 3 hours, why not make the trip go by a little faster by having a decent conversation. And by “decent” I don’t mean listening to someone else’s problems or learning about their life story.
Just something simple and interesting like sports or a good movie. Who knows, maybe no one wants to talk about sports or good movies or maybe I’m just the asshole that no one wants to talk to on the plane. But if that’s the case then they can piss off.

The plane takes off, I read my book and eventually the stress relieving voice of the pilot comes on and announces we are beginning our descent. This is great news in knowing that the ride is almost over, but also bad news because I know what is about to come next. Sure enough the plane lands and who would have thought the day after Thanksgiving rush could come twice in the same day. Seriously, sit the fuck down. We are all going to get off the plane and I’m guessing it will happen even quicker if we don’t herd ourselves into the aisle. I mean obviously we all need to rush off and get to baggage claim so we can wait there for 15 minutes instead of in the plane. But in a situation like this, who has the time to be rational?

In the end I’m still going to have to fly more no matter what. I guess the best I can do is be prepared with fresh reading material and the latest podcasts. And maybe I’m making a bigger deal out of this than it really is. But I’m not going to admit that because that would mean that I am wrong. And I am never wrong.